do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
a search helicopter?!
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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