i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
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