Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
