I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
