the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
So gin and wine won't be happening again
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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