My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
