I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
