So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Randomize