very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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