Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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