So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
