I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
