i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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