so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
