Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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