Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Randomize
