their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
