hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
