Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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