They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
