Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I'm sobbing to NWA
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
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