I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Shame - the story of my life.
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