I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
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