Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
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