Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
