butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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