We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
