Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
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