New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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