i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
home. puking in laundry basket.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
