I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
