They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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