k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize