I think I just saw someone hide a body.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
