went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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