but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
did you just send me my own nude
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
