i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
