Pappa wants mamma naked
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
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