if you like me you must not know who I am
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
