I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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