This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
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