chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
