I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
