I cockslap morals
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
My breasts were aching with rage.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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