Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
just tell him i said nine months
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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