When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
