of course. lets lasso hookers.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
