So drunk, too bad you don't want this
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
