making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
organizing the empties. That sober.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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