Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
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